Questions from children about who santa is and how he works...I can awnser
Q Why do you wear a red suit? A He was part of the "red army" during all those revolutions in Russia
Q Why do you live in the north pole? A 2 resons 1) hes Russian so he needs to stay close to home 2) if he lived anywhere else he would have kids bothering him all the time
Q Who are your elves? A Runaway Bolshevics,other Russians runnig away from Commmunism, some met other people and had kids. and none of which know that communism is over, they still assume the Cold war is happening
Q How do you get money to pay for yoru toys A Taxes
Q How do you get yoru toys? A Diffrnet ways, sometimes companies give away toys as gifts, other times he has "spotters" who buy the toys in the world
Q Do you pay your elves? A No, they can live in teh North Pole free of charge, they have electricity and running water and heat that is gifts for working at the north pole, dont worry Santa has the payment for it all worked out. he also has worked out what happens if the power is shut off from of the power plants.
Q Who is Mrs. Clause? A A runaway Scandinavian prostitiute
Q how can you fly around the world in 1 night A well its simple really, the only places that celbrate chirstmas are Austraila, New Zeland, Europe, and western hemisphere. so it makes perfect sence. go to Austrialia first then move north from the Southern part of South America, while he is flying there are many Decoy "santas" that fly around with and for him (hint hint the guys who work at shopping malls!!)
Q How do you put Billions of Toys in yoru Sleigh? A Welll for 1 the Sleigh is bigger than what hollywood says. and plus there are these "post offices" basilcy every thousand houses or so he hits a "checkpoint" where he reloads his sleigh appropriatley
Q How do Reigndeer fly? A Genetic Mutation!
Q What do you do when you are not being Santa A he is alway santa but From December 28th to Halloween he lives among us as many assumed identities, then Halloween he comes back the north pole and begins preparing for Christmas
Q Why are elves short? A Because of the Harsh and cold Climate s ness is an adaptaion, the shorter you are the less body heat is needed to warm you. but not all elves are short. there are some tall and short ones, but an elves height determines where they live and what they do. the short and shortest ones live at the north pole and do the things elves do, make toys, count toys, make sure kids are behaving. order toys. the Taller elves are the ones who live among you, they pick up the toys and actually talk to the kids. but for the most part they do not interact. as soon as the elves find out Russia isnt communist they will run home.
Q how does Santa keep track of how well behaved kids are? A The parents
Q How can kids say you dont exist? A Some parents dont feel comfortable having there kids belive in Santa (because if you re-arrange Santa's name its Satan) so they tell the kids that Santa isnt real and when they say that they call up the North Pole and the North Poles master computers have the number removed from there "call list"
Q Is Santa fat? A yes and no? what is your definiton of fat Jonny B from Huntsville Alabama? Most of Santas suit is Hi-tech. fireproof, bulletproff, waterproof fabrics and TA-50 gear.
Q Does anyone ever call the cops because of Santa 'breaking and entering?" A Yes
Q how old is Santa? A the same age as Mrs Claus..never ask a woman how old she is
hit me up with yoru questions and I will awnser them
Sally
01-16-08 2:23 PM
dats ny santas a fake and a lot of us know dat unless we got issues
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ness is an adaptaion, the shorter you are the less body heat is needed to warm you. but not all elves are short. there are some tall and short ones, but an elves height determines where they live and what they do. the short and shortest ones live at the north pole and do the things elves do, make toys, count toys, make sure kids are behaving. order toys. the Taller elves are the ones who live among you, they pick up the toys and actually talk to the kids. but for the most part they do not interact. as soon as the elves find out Russia isnt communist they will run home.
ny santas a fake and a lot of us know dat unless we got issues